If you ignore the advice from the last question, you probably won’t have to face this question. Not what I’d recommend, however. When people ask What is coming next?, it is good news. This question means they can see a little beyond the immediate, and it is usually an indication that you’ve been doing a good job of answering the What’s happening? question.

At any given time during a crisis, you may or may not have an answer to this question. That’s okay. Just continue to tell what you know and what you can tell when you can tell it. Make the time of your next update common public knowledge and keep it, even if you have nothing new to add. Be visible. When you see some future possibilities that you can share, do so. Label them as speculation or good bets or whatever term actually describes their probability. If they become more probable, announce that. If they fade as possibilities, announce that.

Three things a leader can do wrong during a crisis are to disappear, to start and then stop communications, and to make promises in the heat of the moment that they can’t keep later. Practice not doing these three things when there isn’t a crisis, and you’ll do okay when there is.

In a recent interview on the Today show, the musician Jon Bon Jovi told Matt Lauer how much he enjoyed working as an actor with Matthew McConaughey on the movie U-571. As an inexperienced actor, Bon Jovi looked to McConaughey as a leader and wasn’t disappointed. Bon Jovi said that it wasn’t what McConaughey said but what he did that helped him. Leaders teach by example whether they know they’re doing it or not. Do you remember the first time an adult said to you, “Do as I say, not as I do”? Did it strike you as ridiculous at the time? If it didn’t then, it certainly should now. Your development as a leader won’t go very far if you don’t learn this lesson. People inside and outside of your organization will learn more from you about leadership, for good or ill, from what you do than from what you say.

Learning about learning is a hot topic in many workplaces. Businesses in general have reached the conclusion that if they’re not learning about their customers, themselves, and their future on a daily basis they’re losing the race. I’ve observed many management team meetings where leaders have discussed learning strategies and opportunities for their people to get smarter. I haven’t listened in on conversations where they’ve challenged each other and reported on their personal earning goals. And that’s a problem. People will believe that learning is part of their job in your organization by watching whether or not you’re learning.

So, let’s talk about what you’re learning. I hope you can answer this question with two things in mind. First is that you’d be excited to share the skill you’re learning that will make you better at doing your job. It would be great if you could also share how you’re learning. Is it a formal process or a self-study situation? You would tell how you were taking what you’ve learned and practiced and applied it in a real-life situation. You would be willing to share how you might have failed as you tried new skills and how you appreciated the feedback you got from others as you practiced. You would look and sound excited as you described how this learning was making your work easier, more efficient, and more fun.

Then, you would move on to telling us about what you were learning in your personal life. Your face would light up as you described your movement into uncharted waters. Who your teacher was. How often you got to practice what you were learning. How you realized that this personal learning was giving you insights about your business situation—an unexpected bonus. How something could be frustrating and fun at the same time.

After a conversation like this, I’d know you were a lifelong learner and I’d be challenged. Way to go, leader!

In the discussion of the last question, I suggested that building on strengths was a better way to go as a coach than trying to eliminate weaknesses. I hope I didn’t leave you thinking that you never had to do anything with the latter. This is the question that moves you into the tricky arena of weaknesses.

No one likes to think (let alone talk) about their deficiencies— especially with their boss. Asking a person what they need to learn is something completely different. If you were to ask me this question, I’d give you answers that would include lifelong fantasies (watercolor painting), practical stretch goals (writing a novel), and an actual affects-my-job weakness (how to deliver tough feedback to a co-worker). Being about to put one of my well-known-to-me weaknesses in the middle of a list feels less dangerous than blurting out that I’m really bad at giving feedback. (Actually I’m bad at getting feedback, too, but I don’t even admit that to myself. The beauty of the learning approach to weaknesses is that if I get to a class that addresses part of my developmental need, I’m likely to get practice on the other.)

A coaching or mentoring session that focuses on developing a practical learning plan for the immediate future will be far more fruitful in both the short and the long term for both of you.

Remember the last time you took a new job with a new employer? The reasons that brought you to that decision were undoubtedly many and complex. Did anyone ever ask you why? Probably not. Why don’t you do something different and start asking new hires why they decided to join your company?

Asking this question will provide you with insights on several levels. You’ll learn about your organization’s reputation in the industry. You might gain insight into your organization’s relative position on salaries and benefits. You might learn something about your reputation as a leader. You’ll gain insight into your new hire’s decision making process. You can gauge their reaction when asked an unexpected question. Lots of good information, don’t you think?

This is a great place to reiterate the value of silence when asking a challenging question. Years ago, when I was in sales, I learned a valuable technique. It was presented as a sales technique, but I’ve learned that it works in many different situations for many different people including salespeople, customer service representatives, spouses, parents, and leaders, to name a few. It’s deceptively simple, as many effective techniques are, and it works like this. When you ask a question, shut up until the answerer answers.

Sounds pretty straightforward, doesn’t it? Try it, and you’ll discover how difficult it is to execute. Most of us are uncomfortable with silence, and so we jump in to fill it. This behavior has lots of consequences—different ones in different situations—but all of them serious. In the sales world, the commonly held wisdom says it this way: The first person who talks after the question loses. When a questioner fills the silence after their own question, they do lose, big-time.

This is a perfect question to use to practice and develop your comfort with silence. It’s the really at the end of the question that guarantees the need for the answerer to pause to consider their reply. The addition of that simple word pushes the answerer beyond the quick, glib response they might have had ready after considering how much truth you’re looking for.

So, ask this question and wait, comfortably, while maintaining eye contact, and then wait some more. You’ll continue to be surprised how critical silence is for getting good answers to questions, and this question will give you lots of opportunity to practice.